Often, in discussions about old movies, someone will say, “That movie couldn’t be made today.”, and inevitably someone else will disagree.
If you have a Nebula subscription, Lindsay Ellis has a fascinating video about Blazing Saddles and why it really couldn’t be made today, but not for the reasons you’d think; it has more to do with the history of the Western genre and the state of race relations in the US than “political correctness.” I wish she’d put it on Youtube.
So I guess that’s my roundabout answer: any movie that “couldn’t be made today” is probably because of larger social forces than just “too much swearing/violence/nudity/etc.”
ITT
You couldn’t make the sixth sense either, because people would already know the ending.
But seriously, some racist stuff in there would never fly
Richard Pryor helped write the movie. The racists components were intentional as they were period relevant and ripe for mocking
EVERYthing made by https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buster_Keaton
We’ve got laws, now, against the insane shit they did on-set, back then…
Lives were too-cheap, back then…
_ /\ _
One of his stunts literally broke his neck.
He was told by his doctor about it 9 years later.Agree, but the problem with doing it today would be they couldn’t get insurance to cover it.
Blazing Saddles.
Probably the Blue Brothers, but for different reasons. I feel like most of the blues legends are gone.
A lot of the blues legends are gone and a large number of Americans would be upset that they hate Illinois Nazis.
Also used cars cost wayy too much these days.
Yeah they would get sued to oblivion. Fucking copyright law.
Also; most of the actors are dead.
Also you’d need to revive the Bolivian cocaine industry to 1980’s levels.
I watched this recently. I agree it couldn’t be made the same, but it amazes me how many people miss the point. The racists were the ones we were supposed to laughing at, not with.
I think people laugh at the racists for different reasons. Some because they are ridiculous, others because they are saying what the people wish they could.
Blazing saddles was (loosely) remade in 2022 as paws of fury
Sorry about the “up yours, slobber face.” You will of course have the decency not to tell anyone I talked to you?
Idk. It would have to be a REALLY loose adaptation.
I take your meaning but it is a remake and Mel Brooks is involved so…
Yeah I think it’s cool. I’ll have to give it a watch.
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Tropic Thunder
Eh. I think a comedy could still get away with black-face today.
any black-face media has been systematically removed from the internet. you can’t stream any episode of any show that has it. you can typically only watch that content on DVD.
Hmm. Okay, I haven’t paid much attention to that. Although Tropic Thunder does seem to be available for streaming on several major platforms at the moment. Paramount, Amazon, Apple, Tubi, to name a few.
Even the D&D episode of Community was removed due to one of the characters cosplaying as a dark elf.
You can def watch the Sunny blackface scenes on youtube.
It really isn’t blackface though, in the sense that blackface is meant to be a caricature which diminishes black culture and behavior. The RDJ character was written as kind of the opposite - the “blackface” character is shown to be sane, courageous and even wise, while the actor playing the character is shown to be an out of touch Hollywood twat.
You’d get lynched if you make something like this today.
American History X, easily. In fact, that movie had a troubled production during the time it came out, but it would be censored to hell and back were it made today.
The original Robocop as well because Hollywood is too scared of violence nowadays, fun fact, the original Robocop almost got an NC-17 (then X) rating for violence alone and had to be edited 13 times to get downgraded to a hard R* rating.
*Hard R in the movie rating sense, is when an R-rated movie truly earns that R rating through having a lot of violence, gore, swearing, explicit content, or a combination of those factors. It’s when an R-rated movie is teetering on the edge of getting upgraded to NC-17, basically. This old AVPGalaxy post should go more into what the hard R rating entails. The original Robocop got downgraded to this from the NC-17 rating it almost got (X when that movie was in production) after 13 edits like I said.
American History X would be tough just because of all the picketing of the movie for being so mean to Nazis.
That movie wouldn’t see the light of day if it were to be made today.
Jurassic Park, Terminator 2, TMNT ‘89, Lord of the Rings.
Whatever the JP franchise is now, it will never go back to full scale animatronics, and without Stan Winston’s magic, it’ll never be quite what the first (and a bit of the second) were.
Cameron himself can’t recreate the magic of T2 even if his films make billions. He never risks having to “nail this in one shot” stunts.
As for TMNT. Nobody gives a shit they’re suits, we could suspend our disbelief and watched mindblowing performances by great stuntmen in some of the most advanced animatronics ever. Michael Bay can’t even fathom how much better that is.
The Hobbit was plagued by a lot of problems, but I don’t know if even Jackson could pull off the practical effects with digital overlay magic that was the first trilogy if he tried.
That era of Hollywood, practical first, digital to enhance (sparingly) is gone it seems. It’s sad Hollywood has forgotten that that boundary pushing era was what made those films iconic. Rexy had weight, she literally tore a car apart. You can see the chaos of the semi landing in the canal. The turtles hit. The Riders of Théoden truly rode for ruin. Tell me you don’t get giddy when you know that scene is about to hit.
Project Hail Mary was practical first. Real sets, real puppet, with digital enhancements. There is a scene that was filmed with loads of LEDs on wires to cover the shot in blinking red lights. I think it pays off hugely and the film is better for it all.
At the moment I think it’s an outlier and most films will continue to just film green screens and tennis balls but it might herald the return of practical, maybe even full-scale animatronics! I can only hope.
I hope that film wins awards, genuinly good sci-fi made by people who understand movies and dont just fix it in post. It fealt real, the sinple trick of not having sound if the camera is not in a place with atmosphere is one of the most important little details. 2001 gets it right, Firefly gets it right, but if you can hear lazers in space, your just bring a wizard in 0g.
In the sequel of The Thing they first used animatronics and later replaced them with CG. I’m still angry about what could have been an awesome movie. With CG it looks just bad.
You know I was just thinking about this the other day. Netflix will put out their standard 10 hour “epic” and the world still manages to feel a tenth the size, and there will be a tenth of the action as any one of the three hour LOTR movies. It really makes me appreciate just how masterful those movies were, and how every artistic license they took with the original material feels more than justified.
Jurassic Park used CGI for many of its dinosaur scenes, they weren’t all animatronic.
What animatronics were used in LOTR? Gollum was CGI.
I’m not saying you’re wrong but some of your examples don’t seem right.
As I said, practical first, digital secondary or to enhance seems to be the secret sauce of creating something stunning. Most of the intimate shots with Rexy and the kids are practical. When she busts through the sunroof and tries to eat them… terrifyingly real because there’s a “real” thing attacking them. LOTR is real for a different reason- physical armor, cast of thousands. Compare the Rohirrim and armies of Mordor in that movie to the unified CGI mess that is the Battle of Five Armies in the Hobbit. Even using physical miniature sets for the big locations like Minas Tirith gives them weight.
Who is JP? Why is everyone throwing letters around assuming everyone else will understand.
The first two words of his comment were “Jurassic Park”…
Tiptoes. Gary Oldman was on his knees the entire time. I can’t believe this was even made in 2003.
The fuck? Howd they go and cast Oldman in the role as a little person when they had Peter Dinklage already in the film. Dinklage is a fantastic actor. And oldman playing the role on his knees seems akin to blackface.
The trailer says its the role of a lifetime.
That trailer legit feels like a skit.
I can’t believe this is the first I’ve heard of this.
“In the role of a lifetime”
Looks a mildly interesting film. But no way is that Oldmans “role of a lifetime”
Yes! Maybe it’s the role of someone else’s lifetime.
Gary played at least a dozen roles that would have been career defining for a lesser actor. Haha.
The list time I saw this posted somewhere, it was an extended version. I believe McConaghy and Beckinsale did have a dwarf baby and Matthew was the one that couldn’t deal with it. Can’t remember if Kate ended up marrying Oldman.
Team America. From the minds of South Park’s, Matt Stone and Trey Parker 😁.
I think y’all know why.
Because of the puppet sex scene…?
Yes. Now suck my dick!
I took my son to see a puppet movie when we was about 10. Whoops!
Heck yeah, the unedited or “Not Rated” DVD version had the uncut scene where she defecates on his chest! Quite funny at the time, but I cannot imagine then doing something like that now, nor all the 9/11 jokes. Plus making fun of NK’s Jim Jong Il. I feel like you couldn’t really do that without stirring the pot at least a little bit.
Big disagree. It was outrageous then and it would be outrageous now. The southpark movie was fucking mindblowing when I saw it in the theater. Parker and Stone push boundaries, and it works for them every time. Theyre kind of American heroes in my book.
Famously, you couldn’t make Blazing Saddles today because they already made that move in the 70s
Look up all the stunts Buster Keaton did, and shiver. Or The Little Rascals or Hal Roach’s Rascals, whatever they were called.
Or the 1968 version of Romeo and Juliet - while probably one of the best versions ever, nobody today would dare to think doing a movie like that today - it would be criminal.
That doesn’t mean they couldn’t do it today, it would just be a weurd cgi mess wuth marvel level cutaways
Well, the Rascals would be 100% cgi, not just because of the sometimes dangerous things the kids did, but also because they would not be allowed to be 12+ hours a day on set… at that age, they can only be on set for two hours a day IIRC, so filming this today with real actors would be horribly expensive.
And don’t even think about topless bedscenes with a 13 or 14 year old actress…
Idiocracy…
I showed this to my 16 year old nephew and he was legit upset/offended and I had to turn it off.
He was shocked they could say ‘those bad words’ in a movie. I don’t dare show him Pulp Fiction.
Sounds like he needs a cool uncle to counteract the excessive sheltering his parents are doing.
Wait what because of the bad words? I. What?
If you’ve grown up as a kid only having access to the internet in the last 6 years or so, yeah I could see how Idiocracy might be shocking. The dialog in that movie is the antithesis of the status quo nowadays. For a kid without context about the satirical and parodical nature of the film, they might think that the movie was endorsing that kind of language.
It would take some guidance from a guardian on what it means, why its relevant, and why its actually become important over time.
Its a required watch in my mind.
Really good point. Historical context is key
That’s nuts. I remember being 11 years old and one of our friends snuck a copy of South Park’s Bigger, Longer, and Uncut they stole from their older brother over to my place, and when they started singing the “Uncle Fucker” song, we lost our minds laughing, fumbling for the remote to turn down the volume before the neighbor ladies overheard and got us in trouble lol
It’s crazy how much Tiktok has normalized censorship for this generation
Your nephew is kind of wuss.
go away, baitin.
Aw please tell us more about this tragic incident :3
The documentary?
We’re living it, baby!
Maybe some dark history drama stuff. Let’s hope we will be able to laugh about all this again one day
My highschool physics teacher said the Nazis recorded X-ray video of Holocaust victims knees as they walked. Because MRI machines and other medical imagers aren’t large enough to walk around in, the films are still one of the best sources of how the bones actually move naturally under load in situ surrounded by the connective tissue.
The radiation dose required to expose regular film at 24 frames a second killed the subjects.
I really hope they don’t ever make movies like that again.
unfortunately China took up the mantle on medical torture with the Uyghurs.
The Blue Lagoon (1980)
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Blue_Lagoon_(1980_film)
and that’s a good thing.The General (1926)
https://youtube.com/watch?v=tgQ8VwW19iw&t=115sThe General actually first bombed at the box office, leading to Buster Keaton being much more restricted in what he could do. Only later did it become a classic, deservedly so.
Came here to make sure people know Blue Lagoon was literally Hollywood CP.
For the sake of truth, all nude scenes were shot with a 32-year-old body double.
But it still depicts CP.Pretty Baby, on the other hand…
Functionally, it’s not exactly that far off from using AI to remove the clothes of someone. Just with no computers involved, and many more creeps.
Also, imagine the casting process.
“We’re looking for a teenage girl who’s, like, really hot and willing to play a sexual role.”
Jodie Foster and Kelly Preston, both 18 at the time, auditioned but they said “Nah, we’ll go with an underage actress instead. But then we’ll need a body double, so who among these applicants looks like a teenager in the nude the most?”Oh no, Brooke Shields’s parents, specifically her mom, pimped her out relentlessly. She was peddled around NY and LA as jailbait. There’s some magazine cover that says something like “is it pedophilia or is it art?” Peddling straight up CP of pics of Brooke naked and like 14. It was specifically a national Brooke Shields creepiness.
Definitely on the Epstein list if they’re still alive
The Blue Lagoon is the best answer. No one would touch this with a 10 foot pole anymore.
Scream.
The killer would try to call the girl in the first scene and she would just be like “Ew, who actually calls on the phone?” and hit cancel. Roll credits.
Alternatively the scariest movie the girl ever saw would be Five Nights at Freddie’s.
I’m surprised this isn’t a joke in the newer Scream films. At least I don’t remember something like this.
Scream 7 did actually change it up a bit, and most of the interactions with the killer were done over FaceTime
