I dunno, Times New Roman looks an awful lot like a book or a newspaper and reading is woke.

Switch to comic sans like a real murican.

Hey look, a participation trophy

If you’re through

And you dunno

Where to go to

Why don’t you go

Where corporate grifts…

Poopin’ on the Ritz

I understand the point you’re making but refuse to give them the satisfaction.

Also let’s be real, there’s a distinct possibility it was changed because these dumbfucks can’t spell ‘defense’

I feel like millionaire might be too broad a term here but I can’t really think of a better phrasing. There is a pretty big difference between an accomplished neurosurgeon or something retiring at 65 with a few million and some asshat CEO retiring at 40 with 500+ million.

An actual lich, an 80s game show host, and the day shift manager everyone avoids being alone with

Honestly I think they’re trying to drag it out until Trump dies (or at least reaches the drooling vegetable stage of dementia). My guess is he’s in there to such an extent that they can’t even really remove him and have what’s left make sense, so they slow walk it until he dies and then release it. This, in turn, generates a massive enough scandal that they can probably redact whoever the fuck else they want without many people even noticing, but minimal actual consequences, as at the end of the day, everything is now directed at a dead man.

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Maybe he’s operating on Fred Flintstone rules and this time he’ll come around thinking he’s a racecar driver instead.

Yeah, sandwiches at a decent Mexican restaurant are a whole nother level. Cemitas and tortas have basically ruined all other sandwiches for me at this point.

hopefully breaking something on the way down.

Ideally he rolls over Jimmy the Loveseat and Stephen Miller like the fucking boulder in Raiders of the Lost Arc

New lunch special - salami sub, “soup for my family”, and a twisted tea

Assault with a breadly weapon

Unless he’s gonna waddle his fat orange ass out there and do it himself, at this point these rulings are less about whether HE’S going to listen and more about whether the people actually doing his dirty work listen.

Hell, I could be ok with them giving him another one. Not for anything he’s actually done, just because it might literally give Trump a fucking coronary.

The weird prototype gum ended in a orange Creamsicle instead of a blueberry pie, apparently.

Figured in all likelihood this was either going to be something fucking disastrous or the most asinine bullshit possible. Nothing in the middle, just either “fuck it, civil war time” or whiskeyleaks found the ‘call the banners’ button and just could not fucking contain himself.

Hopefully it does indeed prove to be the latter, like it sounds to be.

Edit - also love that they picked the most b list supervillain photo possible for him